Cancer
O, let my books be then the eloquenceAnd dumb presagers of my speaking breast;Who plead for love, and look for recompense,More than that tongue that more hath more express'd.O, learn to read what silent love hath writ:To hear with eyes belongs to love's fine wit.
William Shakespeare, Shakespeare's Sonnets
The risk that feels manageable when you first wake up grows teeth by afternoon, not because the facts have changed but because your body has had time to remember what happened the last time you said yes to something like this. This is not overthinking. This is information your hands and stomach carry from situations your mind has filed away as solved. The reluctance that builds through the day is not fear talking you out of something good. It is recognition, slower and more careful than the quick morning logic that made the risk look simple. What your body knows about this choice is worth more than what sounds reasonable before coffee.