Cancer

The decisions that feel biggest are often the ones where you already know what you have to do but have not yet admitted it to yourself. You keep returning to the question not because the answer is unclear but because you are hoping the answer will change if you ask it enough times. The weight you feel is not the difficulty of choosing but the difficulty of accepting what you have already chosen somewhere deeper than your daily thinking. What makes this week different is that you are finally tired enough of the question to let the answer you have been avoiding move from the back of your mind to the front.